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Helloworld to blast ‘off’ice into space and say “hello universe”

Australian retail giant helloworld is rumoured to be taking another great step for mankind by re-locating its entire head office from North Sydney – into space.

Australian retail giant helloworld is rumoured to be taking another great step for mankind by re-locating its entire head office from North Sydney – into space.

Speculations of a possible intergalactic move were spilled at a recent secret board meeting that included a screening of ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’, a selection of ‘space food’ on the menu for lunch and even one senior staff member excitedly turning up in a space suit.

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Then move could bring a whole new meaning to ‘global product procurement’

Aside from being a cost saving initiative far away from the hype of Sydney, the mission is tipped to bring a bigger perspective to the business with the opportunity for all staff to literally say ‘Hello World’ from their desks on a rotating basis.

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Virgin Galactic could be a much more fun way to get to work

Sir Richard Branson’s Virgin Galactic craft have been suggested as the obvious means of transport to and from the travel space station – though whether Opal travel cards will be valid on the route at this stage remains a mystery with Transport NSW declining to comment.

One staff member (who refused to be named) said that the astronomical move “Really is the final frontier for retail travel in Australia” And that the views from their desks will be “Totally out of this world”.

He also quipped that exploring other universes for new business were not out of the question saying that “It’s well known that parallel universes do exist. From our new base there will be massive potential to explore new markets as well as source undiscovered destinations and new products. We’re excited”.

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Meetings will never be the same again

Whilst the move is not anticipated in the immediate future, initial plans have allegedly begun to already be drawn up with the helloworld ‘Space Station’ concept rumored to include a 99 capsule hotel for longer stays, a zero gravity training centre and an ‘Experts Oxygen bar’.

Is this a crazy idea? Or could it actually work? Share your thoughts below.

IMPORTANT NOTE: This is a KarryOn Comedy article and is obviously satire. It should not be taken seriously and is just for fun.