Sex, Lies and Cruising

Cheating partners, wild cabin parties, group sex and fleeting relationships. This is the treacherous underworld of working on cruise ships and the debauchery that occurs on the high seas.

In her debut book, Sex, Lies, and Cruising, Australian author Cathryn Chapman discloses what she discovered working on cruise ships through a saucy, funny, fiction novel, which she describes as the ‘vanilla version’ of her real life experiences.

Thousands of men and women across the world spend months and sometimes years at a time working on cruise ships, or as Cathryn terms them ‘floating moral vacuums’.

Cathryn has had her heart broken, been lied to, cheated on, cheated with and knows exactly what men and women are capable of when they are working away from home.

She has endless stories of debauchery on board that inspired the characters and funny, sexy and addictive storyline of Sex, Lies, and Cruising.

Set on a cruise ship in the Caribbean, Sex, Lies, and Cruising is a romantic comedy about Ellie Green, a British twenty-something woman who takes on her dream job of working in photography on a cruise ship after dumping her cheating ex.

Australian author Cathryn Chapman

KarryOn caught up with Cathryn to debunk the myths of working on a cruise ship.

What are the things not many people know about when it comes to working on a cruise ship?

There are some really great things – like the fact that many staff and officers get to eat food off the passenger menu! On many cruise lines, and at least in staff and officer positions, you’ll also have a room steward who services your room everyday – much like a hotel. That’s very easy to get used to! You’ll meet people from all over the world – it’s a true cultural melting pot and depending what ship you are on, you’ll also visit a huge range of amazing places!

You do work seven days a week, and even if you have a day or morning off, and can visit the islands, it can be tiring to never have a night off. While your job might not appear stressful, it can be a challenge to be friendly, happy, and polite to passengers all the time, regardless of how tired you are, or how rude they might be!

You are likely share your small cabin with at least one, and up to three people (depending on your job). They only have a tiny bathroom too so only take with you the items you need, and get used to your cabin mates seeing and hearing everything you do in your daily routine!

Do cruise passengers ‘let loose’ on the cruises? What are the weirdest things you’ve seen happening?

Passengers can be really lovely, and often very entertaining. On occasions couples called the Photo Manager to ask if he could send a photographer to their cabin to take ‘intimate’ portraits. The manager would always say no, but you have to wonder what people would be getting up to that required professional recording!

We found it funny that often passengers wouldn’t really listen to you; if you were smiling and friendly, your exact words didn’t matter that much. One time I was setting up a display with my British mate, Trevor. We used to always joke around, calling each other ‘me old luv’, ‘me old slapper’, etc. I was bending down unpacking a box, when I heard a British-accented voice behind me saying, “Can you help me over here, please?”, and I yelled over my shoulder, “I’ll be with you in a minute, you ol’ slapper!” The voice said, “Oh, okay then, take your time,” and I realised then it wasn’t Trevor. I turned around to see an older British gentleman standing there, waiting to be served. I blushed from head to toe. He smiled sweetly – so I don’t know if he heard what I actually said or not!

Are there a lot of romances happening on board the cruise amongst the cruise staff?

All the time. There are hundreds, sometimes a couple of thousand people working on a ship. You’re together in a confined space for many months at a time. There’s also a saying that ship life moves at four times the speed of real life, so people tend to get involved – and subsequently break up – very quickly! It’s an area I would be very careful about though – if I knew someone was going to work on a ship, I would advise them to take their time and try not to get sucked into the action too quickly!

What are your tips for anyone who is looking to get a job working on a cruise ship?

I think it’s fairly easy to get a job on a ship. My first job on a ship was via a photocopied handbook they used to give out at tube stations in London. These days, with the internet, you can jump onto cruise line recruitment websites and apply very easily. Depending on your job, you might be employed by an agency rather than the cruise line direct.

Given how many ships there are there is always a job available in the industry. You can’t ask to be placed somewhere, and you can’t always be guaranteed to be placed as a couple, although cruise lines will often do their best, especially if you have worked for them for a long time.

Sex, Lies, and Cruising is not a cruise line exposé – but if you want to work on ships, it’s an entertaining, fun way of reading about the types of things which might happen! The book is definitely inspired by all the crazy happenings onboard ships, which are so unlike the ‘real world’… but it is still fiction. I spent a lot of time crafting characters and storylines that are relatable and engaging.